I don't feel I'm in love with my husband and need some advice to get marriage back on track.?

We've been together since I was at school, got married 4 years ago and have 2 kids. I don't feel attracted to him anymore. Sex feels like a chore most of the time, and I know that since coming off anti-depressants I'm feeling really low about myself but don't want to start them again. When I was young I had a school girl crush on an older bloke, but thought I was over him as I rarely see him, he's out of sight out of mind. The problem is I saw him on a girls night out, and still my heart races and I get butterflies. He told me his wife of a few months had left him a few days before, and was obviously trying to get a reponse from me as he knows how I felt about him. I know he's a player and probably just trying to make himself feel better. I'm riddled with guilt over my feelings. I've never cheated on my husband but have thought about other guys on a regular bases.How do I get love and lust back for my husband, or should I class this as a sign that this marriage was a mistake.I don't feel I'm in love with my husband and need some advice to get marriage back on track.?
Sounds like a classic case of tying yourself down at too young an age ... if you never went out much with other guys (and from what you say, you didn't because you were with your husband from school to however old you were when you got married) and didn't go out much with your friends on ';girly nights';, you never really got to sample what was available before tying yourself down. To add to that, you've now got kids and they are also a big responsibility (not just a TIE)





Your husband probably takes you a little bit for granted - at home putting his tea on the table, cleaning and washing etc. - so you feel pretty low. This is typical too - I know from experience!





The crush on the older guy is probably something most girls have - and meeting him again and getting the ';my wife's left me'; routine was designed to get you into bed so don't go there!





The marriage probably wasn't as mistake but you BOTH have to work hard at making it work not just YOU! Maybe you could suggest counselling - Relate maybe - and go on your own if he won't go with you. You have to talk to him about everything and make sure he's listening not watching Match of the Day!!I don't feel I'm in love with my husband and need some advice to get marriage back on track.?
Hello Baby,


Marriage is a contract between the married couple and GOD. If HE has not been a part of your marriage then that may be a big part of your problem. I would suggest that you find a Non-Denominational Group of Christians in your area and form a Bible Study with them. You and your husband will grow much closer by studying together and following GOD's New Testament then by ';going out with your friends';. When I go out, it is with MY WIFE. She and I have been married for 31 years. We were high school sweethearts and she is the greatest thing that GOD has blessed me with. We have three children and one grandchild. This life can be as wonderful as you make it together. Have a great week. If I can be of any assistance, please let me know.


Thanks,


Eds, A simple Christian








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spend some time apart if when you get back together there is still nothing ,then you should act on your feelings in a positive way .
Baby, I don't think that your marriage was a mistake.There is time for every thing under the sun including time to feel bored about a thing once cherished. Many have felt the way you are feeling right now but never called their marriages a quit. Try to remove your focus a little bit on the things that irritate you about the man you once loved. Time will heel the wounds. He is the man for you. The guy outside may glitter but may not be the gold. Try to introduce fresh nice things that you have never done before into your marriage and watch your interest come running back to your husband.
No, you have two children, just off anti depressants, your probably taking some time to get back to normal after a quick and hard working 4 years.


I would be honest with your husband and ask him to help you fall in love again. You also need to make yourself feel like a woman again, not a wife and mother.


You need some 'you' time. Buy some nice underwear, wake up every morning and do your hair nice and put makeup on. Start wearing your good clothes for every day chores.


Once you feel great, get a baby sitter. Start small with your husband, go to the cinema, for a walk, just do things together.


Also, tell him to stop pressuring you for sex. When he is not asking for it all the time, youll start to want it.


Good luck, and dont give up
you need to look into you heart and soul and find the reason you and your hubby fell in-love. in a marriage you need to work to keep it fresh and new. my wife and i had a felling out about 2 years ago and she was going to live me. i saw the sign that she was going throw a depression and i kept on show her how much i love her. buy do thins to your mate you will get the love and the lust back . Yes it does take time and you and your mate need to talk about it and find new ways to keep each other happy.





one go way to keep each other happy is to wright love note and help do some of the work that your mate does to help clean the house. even a romantic get -a- way would be a go way to reconnected with your mate. hope this help
try2remember the reasons u married him4...


and think of all the wonderful times that u must have had...we sometimes take the small things4granted...








ps. heart racing %26amp; butterflies is Not LOVE... but the excitement of the unknown etc...
You first need to put the guy out of you mind. accept that nothing will happen and that he is a player, he does not want to commit to you.


What did you used to do with your husband when you first went on dates? Try to re-create them. Think romantic and go for it.................
well you obvously loved your husband at some point as you wouldn't of married him otherwise, just try to remember the reasons why you loved him and chose to have kids with him...you wouldn't want to leave him for someone who could use you
You ahve 2 choices here, either sit down and talk to him, openly, about your relationship, where it's going etc or leave him.
if you love your children, dont ever leave your husband.....





have a date with your hubby, go out of town without the kids....





communicate....tell him the truth....





dont mind that man you said, he's just playing....





stop taking anti-depressants....





the best is, you two can resolve that problem......
Try to bring something new and exciting into your life. Hire a babysitter and go out for the night like you would of done before you where married. Or even better pack the children of to nanny and grandads for a night and go out and then come home to an empty house, or do something spontaneous and exciting that you have never done before. Change something and other things will also change. Don't forget to laugh it is the key to all happy marriages.